Hi and welcome to #MammothMonday.
Lately I have been reading so many things and one thing that keeps popping up is that if you want an authentic audience that appreciates what you have to offer, you have to let them into your life. This is where my Mammoth Monday begins because I am such a private person but privacy often means loneliness in that you put up a façade and the reality is you want and or need someone to talk to.
I have learned the hard way that there are 5 Life and Business ideals that will make or break you as a human being and here is where I start today.
1st and foremost, Get up. If you are lucky enough to have the abilities, get up and start your day. I am going to start my personal story by going back about five years which I know is a bit unorthodox but today I need to get real. So, about five years ago it was tax season and I was exhausted, more so than ever before. I went to the doctor and after blood test and scans and biopsies I was told that I had a little cancerous growth on my thyroid and that they needed to make about an inch incision to remove it. I was told that I would go home the same day and that it would be no big deal. Well, fast forward to the day of the surgery and I woke up to find that I had been cut almost from ear to ear. The surgeon told me that the cancer was on the opposite side of the thyroid and that it was Stage 3. He said they had to clean out my neck and remove the entire thyroid, muscle and lymph nodes etc. I didn’t have time to be shocked because within a few hours they moved me to the cardiac unit because my calcium level had dropped to dangerous levels and the medication they give you to bring your calcium level back up has to be administered on the cardiac unit because the medicine can cause heart failure, WHAT? Fast forward ahead and because they removed so much from my neck, I have mineral issues. I have to take hefty amounts of calcium, my vitamin D doesn’t hold so I take 50000 units per week and I have issues with iron, so much so that I have had 10 iron transfusions. I’ve gone through 4 or 5 rounds of radioactive iodine, body scans, MRI’s and Cat Scans. I’m surprised I don’t glow by now but I know there are so many people so much worse off than me so I get up every day and I get myself going. Needless to say, that health issue in and of itself, has me worn out. I get exhausted easily but I get up and I keep moving. I tend to play a ridiculous mental game with myself where if I don’t think about it than it doesn’t exist, LOL, until it kicks my ass to remind me it’s still here. I’ve spent the last five years or so in and out of hospitals and at the specialist every single three months to undergo specialized blood test. Got a few extra pounds on my ass and no muscle holding my chin up but that’s just vanity and I keep it moving.
Now jumping ahead a little further, last Tuesday I underwent major brain surgery to remove a tumor. I was told that I would have about an inch scar and all seemed to be looking good surgery wise. I have to stop a minute here and describe coming out of anesthesia. I didn’t feel pain like you would expect. What I felt was as though someone had lit my head on fire. This is not an exaggeration. It was as though I was on fire. I could feel the heat and the burning but I couldn’t stop it. All I kept saying was fire, fire and the nurses then began to shoot me up with Dilaudid which immediately nauseated me then within minutes they shot me up with Zofran to combat the nausea. A few minutes later as she’s injecting the IV, she tells me she’s giving me something to help with the pain. I thought it was more Dilaudid but no, it was Morphine, wait…..followed by Percocet. There wasn’t even an option presented to me just administration. I was flying and not in any good way. That night, without asking me, they shot me up with Morphine again followed by Zofran because it made me so sick. In the middle of the night I had my wits back and when they came in with pain meds for the third time, I was able to refuse. It never ceases to amaze me that the hospital has bags of narcotics at the ready but you ask for Tylenol and it takes more than an hour to get approval. How is that possible? Not only that, you get a parade of doctors and nurses coming in and out of your room telling you that being in pain can hinder healing and when you tell them all you need is a Tylenol they look at you like you have three heads. Needless to say, I received my Tylenol after more than an hour and was happy.
Now, my mother, God love her, never invite her to play poker. The next day, while feeling a little weak and dizzy, my mother comes to visit (not with flowers but with cannoli’s in hand for me and the ICU nurses) sits by my bed and I’m curious so I ask her, “How big is it”? I’m hoping it’s even smaller than the inch they said it would be, so I asked. I proceed to pull the bandage from my head, slowly lean forward to which my mother says, “Oh my God”!! Followed by a look of horror on her face. So much for making me feel less self-conscious but I digress. So now let me describe my surgery so you can get the full picture. They cut my scalp about an inch back from my bang line, from one ear to half way between the second ear and the center of my head so, 3 or 4 inches of which is now being held together by about 16 staples. Then, the next level was sawing through my scalp. Being medically ignorant, I thought once they put your scalp back on, it would be “glued” in place but no, I now have a metal titanium plate. So now we are at level three. They had to cut the membrane protecting the brain in order to reach the tumor but they can’t replace that membrane so they put some sort of silicone or something like that in its place. Finally the tumor. In my case I was extremely lucky because the tumor was on top of the brain rather than the bottom. I may not be lucky enough to be sharing this story had the reverse been the reality. So the reason behind the extended cut was that the tumor was able to pop out except for one piece. That piece required some cutting of brain tissue in order to be removed. The cutting has caused slight slurring and trying to occasionally find words but that is expected to only last a copy of weeks while the brain heals. They have also placed me on 30 days of preventative seizure medication because of the cutting which will help to allow the brain to heal.
Therefore, the first lesson is to Get Up because even though I am only out of major brain surgery for one week, I have cried each day out of frustration but I thank God I am able to get up and that is exactly what I do. Get up and start your day without any excuses. Cry if you want but keep moving. I know everyone wants me to relax and take it easy, which I am, but being too still will mentally and emotional kill you. Just get up.
The second lesson for this Mammoth Monday is to Ask for help. I’m so used to doing everything by myself and working for myself that I have backed myself into a terrible corner and I just don’t know how to nor do I want to ask for help. I know that it makes people feel good when they can help you and it takes a huge unnecessary burden off your shoulders if you just learn to ask for help. We weren’t put on this earth to be alone nor should we force ourselves to travel alone. Also, you just can’t ask for the help, you have to accept it the help. As I am typing this I actually started to cry because it makes me feel like a failure to ask for help which is so ridiculous but it is something I need to conquer. I am trying very hard to ask for help businesswise and otherwise just to ease the burden slightly.
That statement leads me directly into lesson 3 which is to Park the Pride. I will tell you from experience that if you allow your pride to take center stage in your life, you will fail. I am not talking about compromising your beliefs, I am talking about your need to want to be right or your need to want to be the savior. Wanting to be right doesn’t make you right. Doing things your way doesn’t mean that it’s the only way to get to the same result. Giving someone else credit does not mean that you failed. Park your pride and your life will flow.
The fourth lesson for today is to stay focused. When life is tearing you down and you have an arsenal of excuses why you can’t do something, stay focused. One task at a time. One chore at a time. One problem at a time. One step at a time. Just stay focused and life will remove all the debilitations you feel and help propel you ahead.
Finally, and I have to emphasize this fifth lesson, Never quit. Plain and simple, if you quit, you’re done. Failure is part of life and the only way to move forward, learn and prosper is to make those mistakes and never quit. Until I take my last breath I will continue to try and continue to help people be who they need and want to be. Never stop trying.
So, as I sit here, many things weigh heavy on my poor sore head. I have come to realize that people and actions can truly diminish your life. Situations can destroy you if you don’t release them. You see, there is another great weight that I has been burdening my every thought and I believe it is slowly killing me because I am suffering in silence. In recognition of Mammoth Monday and putting myself out there in a huge way, I am going to say this out loud and share the fact that after 31 years together and 25 years of marriage, that chapter of my book is coming to a close. Sometimes I can’t breathe when I think about it because it represents a lifetime to me. Not saying anything about it has caused me to prolong the inevitable but I need to release this if I am ever going to take another step forward. Not everything works out for everyone so put your energy into what is working for you and leave the rest behind…..I guess.
Over this past week I have been asked hundreds of times what I need and until today, I couldn’t figure it out or should I say I haven’t wanted to ask but I think I have found an answer. I know I am supposed to rest and heal but how can I do that with a full life that includes a special needs son? I have never been able to accept anything from anyone because of my darn pride and today is no different. I just can’t accept without giving something in return so for those insistent on lessoning my burden these upcoming weeks, I believe I have found a happy medium. First, I need everyone to keep in mind that every post and quick hello has been the most amazing forms of medicine for me this past week. That said, mixing business with personal life, I do have 5 things that if you would like to show your support for me in a different way, it would be greatly appreciated.
First, November is my 25th year in business and I am throwing a huge celebration. Everyone is invited and I would love to sell out the event. I picked November 8th as the date which will be held at Villa Barone Hilltop Manor in Mahopac, NY because it kicks off the holiday season and proceeds from the event are going to Toys For Tots. It’s going to be a great night of fun, food, open bar, dancing, music, giveaways etc. I would love to make this happen so if you would like to join me and help me sell out my event, please go to www.TheMainHustle.com/salsa for your tickets.
Second, I have my signature course coming out January 20th 2020. This is my signature course that includes about ten years of research and development. I have spent the last twenty five years counseling businesses and individuals looking to become entrepreneurs and I have had great success helping them realize their dreams. Unfortunately, you can only spread yourself so thin so about two years ago I was approached by various people and it was suggested that I create a course where individuals and business can have a one stop, self-explanatory outlet for all their business needs. I beta tested it with great success and I am so excited to launch this January. It is intended for anyone looking to spend the rest of their life enjoying financial freedom on their own terms. Based on my hourly rate, my course has been valued at $14850 but it is being presold at only $497. If you are interested in the presale price before prices increase, please visit www.TheMainHustle.com/essentials and enroll today.
My third option/ask comes in the form of my first published book. It is a risqué novel called Fallacious that I absolutely loved writing. To me, writing is cathartic and I enjoy this pastime immensely. When I began writing the sequel to this book, I was taken down a completely different path. I was asked to write an authorized biography about Dennis Kozlowski, the former CEO of TYCO and after two years, massive research and my life being put on hold, Dennis blindsided me and went with an attorney as his author without so much as a phone call or letter to me, totally disregarding any work I had done on his behalf and because he felt she would get him more press because of her status. I have been threatened not to put out his story but after speaking with my attorney, I have been assured that I am in the right and can publish whatever I decide to publish concerning him because of all the documents I possess concerning him. I will be settling that situation soon and the story will come out but until then, if you haven’t read Fallacious, my novel of pastime writing, I would love it if you would get yourself a copy today. You can get the book at www.TheMainHustle.com/essentials
The fourth option if you choose to help me is visiting my swag shop. There are some cute items available for sale if you are interested. Visit www.TheMainHustle.com/swag
Finally, and I almost forgot I have a fifth way if you can help. I am putting together a business directory which will be seen initially by more than 15000 people followed by six months of continuous advertising which will hopefully be seen by approximately 100,000 people. It is a full 8 ½” x 11” page for only $95 for the full six months and then it will be seen in perpetuity as a free download from my site. All advertisements are welcome whether you are advertising a business, an Instagram page, a twitter feed, a charity, your Etsy page, the list goes on. Visit www.TheMainHustle.com/essentials
I can’t even begin to thank you for the time you have taken to read this blog post and just to remind you, Get Up, Ask For Help, Park The Pride, Stay Focused and Never Quit.
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